idk if this the right place to post this and i wud like to read some if ya'll have em...
tru feelin
to be honest i'ma depressed person but play it off with uh smile
surrounded by love ones but been alone since uh child
don't want no one to feel my pain so i hold it inside
no on can hear my soul when it cries
everyone tru feelins always shows in there eye's
in my mind thats where the torture resides
and alot of crazy thoughts i have been hopin to die
the only one who knows this iz god
but i don't talk to him this ain't how it's suppose to be
happiness iz the feelin i know the lease
i know it's weak my tru emotions i don't even show my peeps
cuz if they could see they wouldn't even kno it's me
chicks don't even notice me
but they view and stand point just view and stand point, laugh, joke the wrong talk
make me feel like the way i look iz my own fault
i lost hope i don't even try speakin with them they choose the cheapest of men
the one's who abuse and beat the women
but when i approach it's you seem cool but not my type we can be friends
all i see iz people teeth with they mouth wide
never felt good about myself i'm startin to doubt pride
the world make me feel so bad that i rarely go outside
now don't get this twisted i wud never take my own life or let someone take it
cuz i got uh bright future i'm destined for greatness the rest iz just basic
cuz the people who make fun will need me one day
and i will supply the help believe what son say
i'm to bright to hold uh grudge i don't need the daylight to see uh sun ray
i also hope whoever read this do feel it
hate it or love it but these my tru feelins
the way it iz
ever paid attention to the kids eyes when they look and they fear ya
it's not the same for everyone but to me that look iz familiar
sometimes that look can just kill ya
who would wanna be viewed az monsta when the truth i'm so kind
it can drive you crazy to the point you lose yo whole mind
but in uh way my disorder helps me meet the right peoples
who see it's not lethal and treat me like equals
my friends close they have become part of my fam
they motivate and try to tell be all that i can
how can i??? they never been the target of fools
might of tried em on but they never walked in my shoes
they really have uh point tho, but i'm as sharp az one on em
they tell how it's suppose to be, but blind eye's can't see where i'm comin from
i have been mis treated by mankind but we all visitors on this one stone
surround my self by four walls i'm uh prisoner in my own home
but i did it to my self it the darkness there's no light
words hurt and i been takin sticks and stones my whole life
i have become uh good actor you can't see the pain thru my false smile
it's been rainin but now i see the light i'm tired these dark clouds
uh survivor never dies it depends on the heart now
even tho i don't like it i'm stratin to see it's uh blessin
cuz when it comes to wisdom uh cruel world can teach you uh lesson
stares
i think people don't take in consideration how it affects us when they stare thats how it seems yo
then they point and laught to make they self feel better guess there self esteem low
they can't understand something thats different in they mind i think something iz missin
cuz you treat others how you wanna be treated, it's not toughest decision
they don't think about it bein vice versa how they wud feel sittin in this chair
they seein thru closed eye's they vision impaired
i don't think they feel our pain to explain iz it even worth it
they should take me for who i am on the inside not the skin on the surface
but some approach with kind words and i be open alot
but over time my mind twisted and i can't tell if they're jokin or not
and i thinks that my minds worsened
but i can cope better with some words from uh kind person
but i really wonder if it was vice versa wud i sling evil nouns
and say things in uh attempt to bring people down
i believe i wud stay real
and try to understand to see what they feel
have and outter body exp. and see thru they eyes
place my feet in they shoes and walk on they side
the more that i think about it and i do that alot man
but this disorder really made me the person that i am
let me change that this blessin has made me uh good man
and the shoes that we all share iz the place that i should stand
people eye's still bothers me wud they comfort if they could
but the stares still gives me problems but i'm lucky my legs good
like everybody else
i'm not like everybody who's mind close and eye's open
you out spoken words really do hurt but my soul iz not broken
i have will power and no brakes can stop me from enterin uh depressed state
but i'm strong enough to deflect hate cuz it's alot of heart behind this chest plate
i'm startin to feel like i was blessed in the best way
strollin with people on the same path i guess faith
brung us together wit no dress suits, but the meetin was so formal
raise above the ignorance now people they can't harm you
act like everybody else is just so normal
see our heart beat the same blood pump in that same manner
might not talk with the same gramma but we beat and we tame standards
but we must defeat all the aimed anger and reach for the sky
so we can no longer be looked down on we gotta see that we rise
how come when i'm looked in yo face you never meet with my eye's
to see the tru me look deeper in side
cuz i have uh big heart and i'm not meanin the size
like everybody else we r all equal to god
and if you don't believe the same you dumb slow
uh seed of hatred can't be planted in me it won't grow
and you better believe the pain from the ridicule just don't show
cuz i'm better then that you might be clever with cracks
but i'm honest with myself who better with facts
read this... i'ma good person that what you prolly felt
we are not different at all we like everybody else
the reason i write poems
you know the reason i write poems
cuz the peace iz just quite calm
the only time i can focus with uh pen, sheet, and my right arm
see the reason i right poems
it's the the only way to express how i do feel
my closes people can't see my emotions change and the stress iz just to real
they won't even take uh second to do brail
see the reason i write poems
to put my heart in a frame
my mind stops racin and i can show uh part of my brain
i seem to succeed at the hardest of things i'm kinda smart and insane
sharp az the shooter who see's the target and aim
see the reason i right poems
i can travel the world without leavin my nize home
i'm at ease in the light comes
sometimes in the day times it still seems like the night long
i even despise my lungs cuz it feel like me breathin iz quite wrong
but i'm relieved when i write poems
to escape the evil stares thats leavin my life torn
so people won't see this disorder just me in my right form
i'm not leavin the lights on
thats the reason i write poems
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absolutly beutiful ur words are like strenght to my ear. god ha struely bless u with a talent look into getting this poem publish because alot of people can relate including myself. stay bless and stay strong. when ur down and out ALWAYS FIRST AND POREMOST TURN TO GOD. HE UNDERSTANDS AND TRUELY CARES
Sarah M > Neila simone McgregorMarch 29, 2010 at 10:15pm
Wow I agree absolutely beautiful. Your not alone & thanks for sharing. Stay strong :)
Hey, Devon, love your poetry. You have expressed everything that we Vitilgo sufferers feel at one time or another. Thanks for sharing that. I enjoyed reading it very much.
I think it is wonderful that you can express your feelings by writing. I, too, write poetry and found it was such a blessing for me. I, also, have kept a journal for many years. I recently went back and read some of my earlier journaling and, you know, I found I have healed a lot of my pain and abuse. I am like a new person now, which I personally praise God for. I received so much support and encouragement from online vitiligo support groups. I hope you will keep writing and sharing.
Blessings, Patty
i know how u feel Devon. am not different either. what hurts most is that mi daughter asked whtas wrong with your lips? and being black its to obvious and spreading to my face.i ve learn,t to live by the day as it comes
Devon, you have come to the right place. We all, in varying degrees, feel or have felt as you do. You are not alone. I really think, though, that you need to pursue your writing. It is beautiful and amazing. Maybe there is a writing group in your area, or there are a lot of online support groups for writers, poem and prose writers alike. Also, just from reading your poetry, I wonder if some of what you feel is how you are feeling about yourself, not how others are feeling (maybe some but not all). I know I have had some weird reactions to my vitiligo but have since learned that many people think I have been burned and are probably horrified as, next to being buried alive, being burned is a huge fear for most people. Anyway, keep writing. You are a beautiful human being and your sensitivity is an asset.
i'm sittin in my room still my condition haz grown well
but everyday on this earth i'm sentenced to roam hell
time replays and i'm seein the past
in every moment that seems to pass
i realize i never made it to the otherside where it's suppose to be greener grass
but my future iz quite bright, i can make it, i see the path
and i'ma take it to move on, who can break me i'm to strong
plus all the unbelievein eyes i'm achin to prove wrong
but most emotions iz dead, heart like uh portion of lead
made the bottom of the ocean it's bed,
no brain surgery but ya'll done opened my head
can't wait until i can make thru the coldest of days,
no hate ya'll showin me e-motion instead
people like water over uh cliff, waitin on the downfall
with help you can get back up if you slip, i'm glad that i found ya'll
ya'll gave me uh hand, didn't mind leavin with four fingers
yo positive energy opened my eyes, i'm not seein no more anger
ya'll that the fire that burns inside, the flame iz just glow bright
if you can't see what inside you aimin with no sight
people who's worth uh dollar, can't see me in no light
but uh wise man with 4 quarters can change they whole life
Hi Devon, I know exactly how you feel, I've gone through that horrible feeling of not being like others because of the way you look. it's a feeling that was hard getting use too. The depression was also hard to deal with but by focusing on the good things in life helped me over come this dilemma. Remember we are all great and beautiful people also. It's what is in the heart that counts, don't give up, keep you head high and achieve what ever you desire. Take care.
Replies
Blessings, Patty
i'm sittin in my room still my condition haz grown well
but everyday on this earth i'm sentenced to roam hell
time replays and i'm seein the past
in every moment that seems to pass
i realize i never made it to the otherside where it's suppose to be greener grass
but my future iz quite bright, i can make it, i see the path
and i'ma take it to move on, who can break me i'm to strong
plus all the unbelievein eyes i'm achin to prove wrong
but most emotions iz dead, heart like uh portion of lead
made the bottom of the ocean it's bed,
no brain surgery but ya'll done opened my head
can't wait until i can make thru the coldest of days,
no hate ya'll showin me e-motion instead
people like water over uh cliff, waitin on the downfall
with help you can get back up if you slip, i'm glad that i found ya'll
ya'll gave me uh hand, didn't mind leavin with four fingers
yo positive energy opened my eyes, i'm not seein no more anger
ya'll that the fire that burns inside, the flame iz just glow bright
if you can't see what inside you aimin with no sight
people who's worth uh dollar, can't see me in no light
but uh wise man with 4 quarters can change they whole life
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